thoughts

contact. i crave it. the touch of someone who cares about me. not sex. sex is great, the energy, excitement, electric. it's like only getting dessert when what you really want is somethign filling, substantial, a good foundation. sex is that final touch, the icing on the cake.


what i want right now, with all my heart, is someone who will take me as i am. to quote ingrid michaelson. who will hold me and make me feel cared for and safe. i really miss that. the just being with someone. profound conversations need not take place all the time. just being there with each other, sharing in the comfort of another heart beating, right there with you.


being in a relationship last year where i gave much of myself, realizing after the fact that i had loved, has only put me in a state of want. i want to be in a relationship, with the caveat that i only want it to be with someone i truly care about.


i don't give of my true self casually. my day to day self i will share with the world. i'm not one of those girls who has to be in a relationship, in an "us." i am my own person. i want my compliment, a partner, a play-fellow in my life. i don't believe i have found him yet. I'm still watching for him. i am creating myself right now. I'm sure he will make himself known.